Claims of being free can be put to rest within seconds of the mind deciding to take a stroll down memory lane.  Smiling, blushing, blooming, fragrant,  joyous, alive to tearful, fading, withering, decaying, sad and dead emotions and memories reclaiming their position tends to leave one puzzled and pained rather than liberated.

Guess it’s a matter of time and struggle before freedom is attained. Till then what does one do with the memory flashbacks is still a mystery and something to be experimented upon. Of course freedom is not painless, it IS a painful affair after all.  However, it does leave one exhausted…really!

Till next time, I will ensure I have a smile on my face, a Mona Lisa Smile…..happy or sad….that’s a perspective to ponder upon.

Realization! Yes, there surely does come a point in life, when you feel that it’s time to get things in order. The brain starts to function in normal mode.  It finally decides on sorting the mess created by unwarranted for situations and events in one’s life, the cause of which of course are devils in the garb of mortal human beings. The agenda of these devious individuals is to ensure that the other person’s heart, head, work, peace of mind and overall life is screwed to the maximum extent possible.

When finally a shock wave hits the brain and there is some inflow of oxygen does one realize, the damage done and then first things first, prioritization initiates. It is at this stage when one sets priorities, if it were for me, I would start with the process of elimination, cut the root cause of the problem out of your life and system, to at least control further damage. Then starts the actual process of touching base with the people who would play the role of the healers. They will not only be there to listen to you but also understand and empathize along with providing a shoulder for you to cry upon. These usually are your friends, true friends, will be there to scold yet comfort you. Then the self-realization process initiates, and one realizes that it is the self which should always matter. Self esteem and self respect should never be lost out upon purely because you gave someone the authority to come into your life and get that space where they could easily hurt you and of course leave you wounded. As their agenda was to never be there to standby and protect but to damage and leave. The damage seems irreparable and unbearable but then as time heals all wounds,  there will be a time when the wounds do heal and the pain subsides and life meanders through its course.

At the end of this entire process, what one is left with is – Realization of who matters, who never did and who always will.

P.S.: Just saw the time, I now realize it’s time to hit the sack

If I had a wish, I would NOT EVER want a year like 2010. God, hope you are listening to this! Please do not repeat anything like the events of the year gone by.

The year has changed, the date has changed, 2 days of the new year have gone by already. Looking forward to the next 12 months with a hope of fun, happiness, joy, smiles, achievements, zero pain and zero tensions.

Hoping the same for all!

Happy New Year to everyone. Happy 2011!

Take Care and Keep Smiling!

It’s coffee time (barely 30-45 minutes from lunch) and my phone rings again…again office….loud conversations fill my backdrop..their attempts to reach out the person on the phone and get the point across that I am out and busy were of course futile. A 10 minute long conversation again of no life threat emergency continued.

In a span of my 4 hours out of the house with friends…I must have spent approximately 30 or 45 odd minutes on the phone. I don’t mind the calls but whatever happened to letting people unwind and letting people enjoy their day off??? Guess it’s too much to ask for when you work. After a point it got unnerving and I was kind of irritated. But then not much of a choice we have…do we?

Pankhon ko hawa zara si lagne do
Dil bole soya tha ab jagne do
Dil dil mein hain dil ki tammana sau
Do sau hon chalo zara sa tapne do
Udne do udne do
Hawa zara si lagne do soya tha ab jagne do
Pankhon ko hawa zara si lagne do

Dhoop khili jism garam sa hai
Suraj yahin yeh bharam sa hai
Bikhri huyi raahein hazaron sau
Thaamo koi phir bhatakne do
Udne do udne do

Dil ki patang chahon mein gotey khaati hai
Dheel toh do dekho kahan pe jaati hai
Uljhe nahin toh kaise suljhoge
Bikhre nahin toh kaise nikhroge
Udne do udne do

As I listen to this song, I feel I am floating in air. For no reason, I feel lighter (hoping it continues like this)

Keeping in tune with the above para, the past few or more so that last week has been a week of revelations and realizations. Realization coz I was trying to erase certain things pertaining to my life and revelations coz they would never leave my side however hard I try to erase or forget them. Some more revelations happened, hoping is good and keeps the aspiration levels high but what is more important to not put everything on stake on those hopes. This makes it sound like one should consider cautious hoping!?!?! Blame games are passe for me, I believe everything happens for a reason and to teach us a lesson. Learning lessons = Life. Still figuring out all the reasons and lessons. Guess figuring this one out would take sometime.

And I have a new mission now which is to bring my focus back on track. Hopefully I should be able to.

Saw Wake Up Sid finally….another feel good movie showing happy endings. Not always do things sort themselves out and lead to happy endings. At times trying too hard also fails. Guess I will have to wait for something like this to believe in it strongly. Lucky Ranbir Kapoor, he fails and yet lands up in his sort of dream job and gets the one he loves in the end.

Looking forward, Diwali is finally here..yay!!! Though not much of a celebration this year…but still the festivity in the air is getting to me…cheering me up like crazy…and I am not regretting it…not one bit. Infact I am enjoying myself. The colorful, fancy and innovative lights decorating Delhi houses makes you want to capture the pretty picture it creates. Happy Diwali to everyone (not many to say everyone here ) I have a 3 day long weekend coming up…triple yay! I hope to take sometime out for myself and just rest and enjoy myself. Hopefully, I can meet up with friends with whom numerous plans have been cancelled or failed to materialize.

Signing off for now…..boy do I feel nice after writing

Till next time-Happy Diwali, Take Care and Keep that smile coming my way.